I thought I could take it. I thought the day had come when we could all just get along, and we could all live as one. Imagine.
First, he ate my radishes. Mischevious mystery digging everywhere; I wasn't sure who was the culprit.
Then, he ate my strawberries, as they ripened. One. By. One. In spite of the bird netting carefully placed and secured (or so I thought). Caught red handed (probably even literally [!], stained from delicious finally ripe strawberry), the little fucker ran off the deck, dropping the half eaten berry on the rail before making his escape.
But now, he's gone too far. I arrived home and, following my normal routine, anxiously went on the deck to check the status of my Tom Thumb lettuce seedlings and to see if my other lettuces had sprouted.
What did I find, but murder! Mayhem! Half the Tom Thumb pot excavated and my seedlings, the precious innocent (not even yet delicious) baby seedlings, flung far and wide and laying dead or dying.
Horrible... Oh the humanity! Tiny bits of green everywhere. So tragic!
Little fucker. I've got plans for him.
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3 comments:
Litte motherfucker. As a kid I grew up loving squirrels; had a wild pet squirrel and everything. Bought a house and no more squirrel love. They benefit from being some of the cutest rodents out there but really they are just crazy little pricks and they have little regard for anything you do outside. I was with a client yesterday, and they have a garden and i was like "I want a green house", and they were like "oh just plant in the ground eh", that shit won't fly. I'm overrun with squirrels, I keep a slingshot and paint balls and run them off whenever I can. Wanna borrow a squirrel trap eh? Wanna borrow a .22 with subsonic rounds? ;)
HAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAAA.
Welcome to gardening.
I mean. I'm sorry to hear that.
This was to funny and I can relate to your story,
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